When The Time Comes

Perhaps you are reading this today and you are going through an extremely difficult, low point in your life.

Maybe you are leaping for joy over receiving some incredible news or some dynamic event is just on the horizon.

Maybe you are just curiously checking this out today and while you're not low, you're not as high as you could be.

You're just kind of...there.

Maybe you are filled with all kinds of questions.

Why? How? When? Where? Who?

Uncertainty is gripping your life right now and it appears that the walls are closing in from all sides.

If I could offer you some encouragement today, may I tell you about my Lord?

His name is Jesus Christ and He is my absolute best friend! I have been where ever you may be standing today, whether it is in the lowest valley or on the highest mountain. Yet, through it all, He has always been there with me. Even when I don't feel like there is anyone around who could possibly understand what I'm going through or how I'm feeling, He has faithfully and continuously proven that He does as He says He will do...

to never leave or forsake me.

I have just recently come out of a somewhat dark time in my life. Spiritually, I was just going through the motions, hoping that one day I'd eventually get out of whatever rut I was in and things would get back to normal. I was reading my Bible, although not as often or consistent as I ought nor with the same passion for seeking His voice. I was going to church but had somehow picked up a pair of judgmental, critical glasses that seemed real good at finding faults with others yet caused me to view myself as a victim, a martyr of sorts and innocent of any sin or crime.

And yet, there was not any kind of refreshing upon my soul. It seemed as if the heavens had shut themselves up and I was wandering alone out in some barren wasteland...spiritually speaking.

However, this past weekend, praise the Lord, He opened my eyes to show me my own sinful, prideful nature and how I had to admit that I shouldn't be so worried about anyone else but me.

What was I doing to get closer to Him? Was I confessing my sins and turning away from my fleshly desires? Was I seeking Him with all that I had? Was I making genuine, serious time to spend with Him? After all, if I am telling people that my best friend was Jesus, why wasn't I treating Him like a friend?

Why wasn't I treating Him as so much more than that? The King of all kings, Lord of all lords, ruler of Heaven and Earth, the Author and Finisher of my faith? The One who paid that ultimate price for my sins and gave His life in my place? The One who's blood not only washes but cleanses me from all my sin and shame?

That same Jesus who loved me so much back then to leave His home in Heaven to come to earth only to die upon a desolate, rugged cross?

That very same Jesus who STILL loves me this very moment and wants so very much to have that personal, intimate relationship with me...with all of us...despite the valleys I'm going through or moutains I'm climbing?

The truth of who He is became so very clear to me again and it was as vibrant and fresh as the first time I realized it!

Jesus loves me, regardless of who I am, what I do, where I live and the sins I've committed. His love never stops and it's always there. For me, as a child of His, I am like a sheep as the Bible says "who knows the voice of it's shepherd". In fact, He loves each of us so much that as a powerful parable states, He will leave the flock of 99 to go seek and find the 1 who is lost.

"When he has found it, he JOYFULLY puts it on his shoulders, and coming home, he calls to his friends and neighbors together, saying to them 'rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep!'" Luke 15:5-6

This is exactly how Christ feels when He brings us home! He rejoices and carries us home to be with Him and to me, there is no better feeling (or knowledge) of the realization that He loves us so much, He is willing to leave the flock to find the one. And did you read the scripture? It didn't say He takes his crook and beats us over the head and ties us to a tree behind the shed or feeds us thistles and briars.

No.

It says "he JOYFULLY puts it on his shoulders". In fact, that parable goes on to say that "there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over 99 righteous people who don't need repentance."

There is a song by Avalon called "When The Time Comes" that speaks of this love. It's a song that has really brought such encouragement and hope back into mylife. It talks about how we all go through the times I've mentioned above...how when we get so wrapped up in our own lives, will we be ready to seek Him when we need Him most? It says:

"For every soul there is a dawning
When we see there's more to life than we believed
Faith is that one road that's left to travel
But it means we have to start to trust what we can't see
Then at last
We chose to take that first step

When the time comes
And the games are finally over
There's no more pretending
All charades are done
And the time comes
When the soul is finally ready
You know the truth and
This time you don't run
God is waiting there, you'll find
When the time comes

He'll rush
He'll reach
He'll run
He'll do
Anything to get to you..."

I don't know about you, but that brings such joy into my life!!! To know that wherever I am, He'll rush, reach, run and do anything He needs to do to get to us!!

Wherever you might be today, know this my friend.

This love, this relationship, this security and peace can be had by anyone. All you need to do is seek Him, cry out to Him and believe.

Trust Him. He is there, just waiting for you to call.

Will you be ready when the time comes? Are you ready now?

Jesus is and He loves you and wants to be with you this very moment. Please...don't let this time pass you by.

Seek Him while He may be found for He may be so much closer than you think.

First Day of School 2007

Well, it's finally here.

The first day of school for Fall 2007! A day in which many kids rejoice and rebel toward going back to school. A day in which there are numerous tears shed by both parents and children. Tears of sorrow (kids) and tears of joy (parents) and some of both (kindergarten parents).

Today is the first day for our kids. Kaitlyn is going into the 4th grade while Jake is starting kindergarten. He was so thrilled about starting it up last night, he was shaking his fists and squealing like it was Christmas Eve. When he got up today, I almost expected him to come running down the stairs looking for his gifts.

Thankfully, we didn't have any kind of conflicts, late arrivals or forgotten lunches. The kids were up and dressed and ate their breakfast at light speed. And, as we all suspected, Mommy wanted a few pics with the children.

Here are a few of those.

Kaitlyn striking a pose, ready for those 4th grade boys:



















Mommy helping Jake tie his shoes:















Mommy messing around with the boy's hair:



















Mommy, Daddy & Jake about to go to the kindergarten wing:















Jake leading the way with Spider-man:



















We arrived to a somewhat controlled chaos in the kindergarten wing with numerous parents dropping off their youngsters. I only saw a few moms wiping their eyes and even less kids bawling. Jake was too excited to see his teacher to be upset. He had new territory to conquer, new friends to make and new audiences to win over with his wit & charm.

Judging by the way he eventually & summarily dismissed us both, I think he was eager to begin his journey of higher education. We left him sitting at his table, watching him furiously smash a big pile of Play-Dough, complete with sound effects. I was a little sad inside as I watched my little running buddy for the last 5 years sit there alone, without his Daddy, making new friends and eagerly anticipating his teacher coming over to see him.

My...no, OUR little boy has grown up.

Kaitlyn, on the other hand, wanted nothing to do (emotionally) with us during this time. She'd already met up with her girlfriends and they were too busy catching up on all the summer gossip, which teacher each friend had and what boys came back from break looking cute. When we waved across the cafeteria toward her, she gave us that glare that said "Dad, quit embarrassing me! I'm fine and I'm talking to my friends!"

Amazing what you can hear just by looking at a 9 year old's eyes. LOL

Once we got Jake dropped off without incident at his room, it was time for us all to leave. The parents that is. As we were walking out, I suggested we stop by Kaitlyn's room to wave good bye one more time before we left. Jennifer thought I was joking and lagged behind me a bit but I forged on, armed with my "daddy-cam".

With the tape rolling as I snuck down the hallway, I crept around the corner to discover Kaitlyn's teacher sitting with her back towards me. As I scanned the room with the video camera, looking for my lovely, sweet daughter, I found her as she was listening intently to her new teacher.

Suddenly, she found me and (this is all caught on tape) shot me the same glance from the cafeteria. Only now, it was a lot more intense and urgent, demanding I cease my embarrassing behavior, stop the tape and leave the premesis!

Again, amazing what a father hears through the eyes of his daughter.

I played back the video as Jennifer & I walked out of the school and saw the "glare" I got. Laughter erupted from us both as we saw the raw emotion being shot right at us. I'll know for future reference to not harrass my daughter like that on any upcoming first days of school.

She's definitely pretty good with those visual daggers.

Meet The Teachers

Well, we can't stop it now.

The boy is OFFICIALLY on his way to kindergarten.

Monday will be a day of tears. Tears of sorrow and tears of joy. It will all depend on who you ask as to which particular tears are being shed. I'm sure there will be a few sniffles and eye wipes from Mommy as she sees her little man strut down the hallway into the big kindergarten room. Who knows? Daddy might all of a sudden remember a poignant scene from Magnum PI and sniffle a bit too.

Last night was the official "Meet Your Teacher" night at the kids' school. They posted which teacher had your child around 1pm yesterday to avoid anal mothers from calling up and requesting that Susie be in the same class as Sally or that Tammy not be in Tommy's class or even Muffy not be in Miss Brown's class.

Believe me, it happens a lot more than we may realize.

Anyway, we found out which teachers the kids are going to have this year. Jake is going into the big "K" and Kaitlyn is beginning 4th grade. I am still in shock at times our kids are growing up so quickly.

We woke the kids up around 4pm from a well-deserved nap after about 2 hours at the pool. When you're outside in this wretched heat doing any kind of physical activity, it's going to take it out of you. Believe me, when we got home, there was plenty inside Jake that needed to be "taken out" but I allowed cooler heads to prevail and he escaped with a nap instead. LOL

However, when both kids got up from their naps, had a snack and got dressed, it became VERY apparent to Daddy that his babies were growing up. Just look at how big they both are. Sniff...sniff. Does someone have Magnum PI on somewhere 'cause I'm getting a little misty-eyed.

So, we all pile into the Sequoia and head a mile or so up the road to school. Already, you've got about 400 SUV's driving across the school property to find as close a spot to the front door as they can. It's important that Susie's mommy not sweat off her new facial and hairdo she just had done at the salon 2 hours earlier.

Oh...and what is it with some of these moms wearing low cut v-neck summer blouses that don't do a very good job of covering what they're supposed to cover? It's absurd and cruel to do that to all those pre-teen boys. We actually know of a mom here in our neighborhood who confronted one of these "moms" and told her that "grade school functions aren't where you need to be exposing yourself like that."

Bravo to you, ma'am.

Anyway, we all hit the door and wade through the humanity of people. Kaitlyn saw about 4 of her best friends within 45 seconds and she was all smiles. She was already excited to realize she and a few of her absolute best friends are in the same class too! I give it about 2 weeks until the desks are separated and there's a note coming home telling us how "well Kate communicates with her girlfriends."

Like mother, like daughter. LOL

We took Kate to meet her teacher first...Mrs. Barnett. Oddly enough, that is also Grandma's name, who was also a teacher so we're already off to a good start. Mrs. Barnett is a bit older than some of the other teachers there but she was warm, friendly and smiled a lot! That put us all at ease because the last older teacher Kaitlyn had was in 2nd grade and that was NOT a very fun year.

Then, it was time to go meet Jake's kindergarten teacher. Of course, she has a very loving, warm nature and a soft-spokenness that would make any child at ease. Jake was no exception. As you can see in this picture, he was all smiles for Ms. Vann, strutting around and putting on the dog. However, we feel not nearly as stressed after meeting her. Hopefully she'll be able to handle the boy and I won't be called into the office too many times for his "personality and character".

I guess there's a reason people call him a "small version of me". I'm just praying he keeps the "me" down to a minimum at school.

Busy Bees

I always thought that summer was supposed to be a sort of "down time" for family & friends to chill out and hang together. True, we've had a lot of great fun traveling to places like Branson, Nashville and all points in between. But when we have been home, it seems like we are just buzzing around the hive at 90mph!

For starters, Jennifer just started a new job with a radiology group here in Fayetteville. After working with her former group for the past 4 years and watching everything around them crumble down (ie: partners retiring, losing vacation and time off, no help in recruitment, etc), she was offered an opportunity to join a group where she'd be working 4 days a week, no nights, no weekends and no call!! Talk about a real answer to prayer!

She's been at the new group since August 1 and although there have been a few areas of adjustment to contend with, as there normally are with any new job, her routine is starting to smooth out as she becomes more familiar with their style of work. Her new group have all been so wonderful thus far and are almost insisting she start thinking about vacation. They've even gone so far as to reschedule next Monday for her so she can be there when Jake starts his first day of kindergarten. They did all this without telling her until it was all done! How cool is that?

Speaking of Jake, it's hard to realize he is indeed starting kindergarten next Monday (Aug 20). We get to meet his and Kaitlyn's teacher this Wednesday and get any last minute details to help get the kids ready. Even in the midst of all this excitement, it's kinda hard to see your little boy step out and get ready to begin school. Sure, he's done preschool programs for the past 2 years but for me especially, since he is a major reason why I quit radio to stay at home, it's going to be tough watching my little buddy (my "mini me") go off into the big world of kindergarten.

However, as much as I fear and worry for him, it's tripled that for the teacher who'll get him! LOL

I have a weird feeling I'm going to not enjoy those parent/teacher conferences as much when I meet with his teacher. Something tells me I'm not only going to be "getting it" from the teacher but I'll also be on the receiving end of "the eye" from my wife. You know...that look that says "he is SO much like you and for that, YOU will suffer my wrath!"

You know...loving looks like that. HA!

Kaitlyn has had quite the jam-packed summer too. She's been to a few cheerleading day camps in addition to her night classes (she's even taking a secondary class called "flight school" where they are throwing my baby up in the air and teaching her how to fall into their arms properly) and with all this activity, she's really getting herself into great physical shape! She also got back from church camp last week and aside from a few snooty girls who she had to room with and some unbearably hot days, she had a great time. We were so grateful and excited to have her home...as we then put the kids to bed within 2 hours of her arrival!

Hey, that summer heat can make you tired a lot easier and the kids need their rest. LOL

I've had my plate full too. I've been running the kids back & forth to whatever activity or friend's house they got going on, running myself back & forth from the health club to even running the hot & humid streets of Fayetteville (I've lost close to 20lbs), had numerous yard projects that have included weeding out gardens and trimming any & every plant and mowing the yard to now, much to my shagrin, I've been recruited by my wife (I didn't even receive a vote) to do some painting around the house.

As of this morning, we have these rooms listed for a color change:

guest bathroom, the playroom, the master bedroom, the master bathroom, 2 walls in the hallway and possibly Kaitlyn's room and the kitchen.

It's good to know I won't be out of a job once the kids go back to school, right?

With all the activities we've all had, I feel like I've kind of drifted away from some of my more important appointments, namely my time of growing with the Lord. I don't know where or when but it just seems like there are times when I'm drifting around with no direction, looking to cast my sail on a windless sea. I know I'm not the only one who has gone (or is going) through these times of wandering but the one thing I do realize is that as the book of James says...when we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us.

I've had some incredible mornings where I've done just that. By making it a priority before the sun rises, before I go work out, before the kids and Jennifer get up for the day, I've found myself really hearing from God by praying, reading His word and just listening to His still small voice.

I've been reminded by a few pastors over the summer that God never stops loving us and that these times of "drifting" can actually be times of refinement or instruction. I heard one pastor say recently that even when we think we're producing good fruit, the Lord will prune us back again in order to make us even more productive. While I know that at particular times I can feel the momentary pain of His shears, I know that He is refining me for something bigger and better, according to His plan for my life.

There have been a lot of questions and concerns I've had recently about what God wants from me. I've even wondered if maybe it's not a "what" issue but perhaps it's a "where" issue. There are times that I really ask Him if our current church is where we need to be. It seems that within the past year or so, that "connections" that I had with that church 2 years ago are no longer there. Connections to the choir and worship ministry, the media department and even our small group.

What has caused this?

Is it me and my ego/pride? Is it my selfish ambition and dreams no longer being realized?
Is it a "new direction" reason that I'm no longer involved?
Is it me and my hurt feelings about not being used?
Am I looking to take my ball and go home?
Are we not connecting like we used to because of something within us or is it just a simple thing of people not being able to relate?
Are we not reaching out like we should or even like we used to?
Are others not reaching back or are we not feeling that reach?

Or is it really something like God is leading me and my family to a new place of worship, to a new body of believers and a new chapter in our lives?

There has obviously been a great deal of concern, pain and confusion over some of these things and I am confident that whatever issues have come up, I have had a large part in feeling what I am now feeling. The flesh is very quick to assess and place blame on others without accepting responsibility itself. Yet, I know that my personal pride and self are contributing factors as to why I feel this "disconnect".

Whatever the reasons are for feeling this way, I know that God will indeed give me clarity and peace about where, when and how we are supposed to do that which He wants for us. I also know that He will show me where and how I have failed. Yet, thank God for His mercy & grace...He will also restore me!

I just ask that if you read this today, you will lift us up in your prayers that whatever the outcome may be, God's name will be lifted up and we will be obedient to His call for our lives.

Hey Now, Hey Now...Our Kaitlyn's Back!

After a few days of being without Katie-bear as she was away at church summer camp, we are all home tonight, resting comfortably and happy we're back together! It's something to see that big old yellow bus drive away with your child on board, hoping that they come back to you safely and the way you left them. It's even more heartening to see when God answers your prayers and your baby girl does indeed return home safe & sound!

There were tons of parents there tonight to welcome home their little campers. Even as the temperature of the hot & humid Arkansas night was still a sweltering 93 degrees and even as the sweat billowed down the faces of parent and child alike, that didn't stop any of us from giving our kids a giant hug and kiss!

Even Jake got in on the act as he told me several times during the past few days how much he missed his big sister.

It's a wonderful feeling as I get ready for bed to know all is well, your family is together and we're all sleeping under the same roof tonight.

God is certainly good and faithful and I thank Him as I wind this up tonight for giving our daughter (and all the campers) His divine protection & traveling mercies and for giving us parents the patience to get through those 3 hot days of summer.

Welcome home, Kate!

Hot Fun In The Summertime

It's been quite a while since I last wrote anything but that's not to say that we haven't been busy. Since July 12th, we've had a birthday for our daughter Kaitlyn (9), been to Branson for a few days of waterpark fun and walking all over Silver Dollar City, traveled to Nashville a few days after that to see my new nephew Brady and visit the rest of my family, come back home and watch my wife start a new job and still continue on with my new diet/exercise routine.

As it stands now, I'm closing in on losing 20lbs, which is great to know but still I have a longer road ahead of me as I need to still peel off another 20-30 lbs before I'm in the neighborhood I want to be. The good thing is that the highly-feared "weight loss plateau" hasn't occurred yet, although my expectations of losing >2lbs a week is a bit lofty. I'm doing about 1-1.5 lbs so I'll have to be content that the weight WILL come off but just at a slower pace.

Tomorrow, August 5, we say goodbye to Kaitlyn as she leaves us for a few days for church camp. Even though there are plenty of "intense fellowship" moments going on tonight between she and her brother, I know that I am going to miss her like crazy.

So will Mommy.

They aren't allowing any kind of cellphones, emails or most any other kind of communication for those 3 days. I suppose it's a good idea to prevent anyone from stealing kids' electronics and keeping them from being on the phone at all hours of the day but I'd love to get a call or 3 from her during that time.

Who knows? Maybe that'll still happen.

I've been doing some major yardwork projects too. We used to have an entire wall of ivy on our home but it got to looking rather unkept and sloppy to me so I ripped it all down last Wednesday. As usual, what was supposed to be a quick, one-item project in my mind turned into something much more complex.

Not only did I rip down all the vines & ivy, I had to go dig up the root balls of each ivy plant. I also got to climb a ladder and scale the outer heights of our home to rip off the stragglers that didn't make it down with the rather large ivy bunches. You don't really see how many of those vines and their "suckers" have embedded themselves into the brick on our home.

Not to mention the gutters. Sheesh. I'm gonna have to concoct some sort of bleach power wash to scrap all the ivy residue off but hey...at least the wall is now clean and bare.

Wish I could say that for my hands. I ripped them up pretty good too by not doing the common sense thing and wear work gloves. Yes, I can be quite mule-headed sometimes.

I'll try to download some of the pics from our recent adventures and post those later.

Stay cool. We're "enjoying" that famed Arkansas humidity right now. Highs in the mid 90's which puts the heat index well into the triple digits.

Gonna make me sweat indeed.

(cue C&C Music Factory music)