Yes, I'm Still Here...

Well, as you can tell, it's been a while since I got on here to write anything. Part of it has to do with how utterly busy we've gotten as the school year is winding down, part of it is all the extra-curricular activities we're all involved in and some of it has to do with me trying to get my priorities straight.

First off though, from my last blog when I wrote I looked more like the Pillsbury Doughboy than Macho Man Randy Savage, I've been on my new diet & exercise program and have lost about 6-7 pounds. Granted, as happy as I am about losing the weight, I'm a little disappointed it's not coming off any faster. My daily goal is to walk about 10000 steps, a goal I've hit several times but not consistently. My dietary needs (ie: hunger) is starting to subside so my Healthy Choice meals are filling me up more, along with a big leafy lettuce salad and the 100 cal snack every 3 hours. I just need to stay the course, keep lifting my weights and running around on either the treadmill or the neighborhood and the weight and inches SHOULD start coming off more consistently.

We just took the kids to Branson for the Memorial Day weekend and stayed at a place called Big Cedar. It's a resort that is pretty much self-contained, offering anything you might want to do there on the grounds. We took the kids to their pools and water slide for swimming, to the stables for some horseback riding for Kate...Jake rode a pony named "Festus"...some great restaurants and an incredible Memorial Day fireworks display Sunday night. Needless to say, the kids did NOT want to go home that Monday and to be honest, neither did Mommy or Daddy. I was happy to see, however, that even though the brunch & buffet tables called my name loudly, I did not gain any weight and was even able to walk around the Big Cedar property twice...once in the rain (unexpectedly).

We also took the kids out on the lake to ride on the Showboat Branson Belle, a big boat that serves people dinner and then a nice family show of singing and comedy. The kids were very excited to be on board, sitting next to the big red rudders in the back of the boat. The kids even got a chance to meet the captain and see the big 10 ft steering wheel that helped drive the boat. We almost didn't make it though. The sheet we printed off the internet said the cruise started at 4pm but said nothing about boarding starting at 3p. As a result, we arrived at the boat with only about 10 minutes before they unhooked it from the dock and set sail. So, if you're ever planning on sailing the BB, make sure you're there an hour before the cruise starts 'cause they won't wait! HA!!

Jennifer is going to be starting a new job in Fayetteville on August 1 and we are thrilled to no end!! She'll be starting up with a group that offers 8+ weeks vacation a year, no call, no holidays, no nights and no weekends. You can't imagine how excited we all are to have Mommy home with us every night, weekend and holiday!! Oh, I forgot to mention...she'll also only have to work four days a week. Not a bad deal at all, eh?

We give God TOTAL glory for giving her this rare yet perfect opportunity!!

I got an unusual phone call from a Christian radio station right before we left for Big Cedar. They wanted to know if I might want to come work for them any time soon. I was extremely flattered and initially very excited to think about returning to work again until I sat down and really thought out what me going back to work would mean for our family.

I would be the one working late afternoons and early evenings.
I would be the one working weekends.
I would be the one working holidays.
I would be the one working with only 1-2 weeks vacation a year.

With Jennifer joining a group that was offering her the exact opposite of what I would be doing, we quickly realized that a full-time afternoon on-air job would not be very beneficial to me or the family. I politely declined their offer but I did say I'd love to help them out with any and all voiceover needs they might have. Their new Program Director and I hit it off pretty well and we've decided to meet one to two times a month so he can pick my brain because of my prior work experience and talent (he don't know me berry well, do he? Huh huh huh huh...read this in an Elmer Fudd voice). In all seriousness, it'll be great getting to talk to someone about radio issues as well as life in general and how God has led us each in different paths yet similar experiences.

As far as getting my personal priorities straight, that continues to be a work in progress. I'm finding that this doesn't only affect me adversely either. A lot of my friends & family relate to me the same things I'm feeling...of how I want to be able to meet with God early in the morning but I am so exhausted at 6am from working out or chasing the kids the day before (or even admittedly staying up too late watching TV) that if I DO make it into the living room for some quiet time, I'm too sleepy to concentrate on what God's word is telling me.

I've tried to make the 8-10am window my time to stop things and meet with Him but with my new workout schedule, I've found myself getting "busy" with my own stuff and agenda that often I fail miserably to set aside some time to just be with God. Granted, I know that He knows that I love Him with all my heart and He lives within me but I've felt such a disconnect from several points in my life and I know for a fact it's due in large part to me not making that effort for Him...to meet with Him, to pray to Him and listen for Him.

Just recently I started going back to choir on Wednesday nights. Our choir has had a new leader since December of 06 and I've noticed a lot of people, myself included, took that opportunity to quit singing on Sunday mornings. I can't speak for anyone else but I know that it had nothing to do with our new worship minister joining up as to why I quit coming. Initially, it was because I was taking some classes on Wednesday nights on discipleship but as time progressed and the classes ended, I really enjoyed going to church as a family, in one car, sitting with my beautiful wife in the audience.

I still do like to do that. However, the call has gone out to all choir members, past and current, to please reconsider joining back in the loft and helping lead worship on Sunday mornings. I thought I'd give it a shot and attended my first rehearsal this past Wednesday night.

I'm not sure what I was expecting but I have to be honest here...I left the church that night feeling disconnected...still. Perhaps it was just the idea of getting back into the swing of things and the old routine or maybe I had been expecting a vibrant, spiritual rehearsal in which God would rekindle a large flame within me. Unfortunately, none of that happened.

Was it because I went expectantly with some sort of benefit to me, instead of focusing on Him? Was it because there is still some disconnect in my life that leads me away from what God wants me to do or become?

Don't get me wrong...there was still that genuine warmth & greetings from some of my old singing buddies but something was not there for me. I can't quite put my finger on it but the old sense of being spiritually uplifted wasn't as obvious to me as it might have been to others.

Pastor Floyd recently spoke on his blog about each Christian going through "spiritual winters" and that it's perfectly normal if each of us go through these times. I'm feeling like that's where I am right now. Yet, while I may not feel as invigorated as I have in the past, I'm reassured by recent events in our lives (ie: Jennifer's job and the call from KLRC) that God is indeed in control, He's watching over us all and every so often, even though we may not give Him the attention He deserves, He gently reminds us that He is still...no matter what season we may be going through spiritually...our Heavenly Father.

Yes indeed...God is good...ALL the time.