Words of Wisdom

For any of you who know me, you know I have a sarcastic and funny side. Hopefully, some of these blogs have given you a glimpse into that side of me.

For those of you who know my wife, you understand I married above my head when we became husband and wife. Jennifer is such a beautiful, compassionate, smart and intelligent woman. I could never imagine my life without her.

Yet, for as smart and brilliant as she is, she has me in stitches a lot because she has an innate ability to mess up common catch phrases.

For example, when you and a person are in a debate and they say something that is not only way off base, but it's completely false, that person has to "eat crow" and take back what they've said. My wife, however, totally botched this one up one day when I came home mad about something at work. I don't even remember what I was upset about but I knew that I was right, as did my wife.

Bless her heart.

In an effort to encourage me, she said, as any supportive spouse would "well, when they see that you're right and they're wrong, they're going to have to eat COW!!"

"Cow?" I asked in a gigglish fashion. "They're going to have to eat 'cow'? You mean like steak?"

"Ummm...isn't that what it is?" she coyly replied.

At this, I lost it and said, through many laughs and guffaws "no, it's called 'eat crow'. You 'eat crow' when you are wrong."

So that has been a good laugh for my entire family for all these years. My wife topped those just this past weekend, not once but twice!! Two times she let out some gems of wisdom and thus, I feel compelled to share them with you now.

We were up late one night sitting around a bowl of cereal and talking about something. I honestly forget what it was but it began to rile Jennifer up. She was talking about how someone was wrong in their assessment of some situation and she, being in the right, was going to have to tell them "how the chicken was going to fly."

Without missing a beat, I said "yes, that's bothered me too for some time."

"What's that" she asked.

"How the chicken is going to fly" I replied in my smart-aleck tone...giggling.

"Stop it Jimmy. You are evil and you shall be destroyed" was her retort. It's become quite a common one at that.

The following day, we were driving through NWA, on our way home from a wedding. We noticed all the growth and construction that's going on and we wondered aloud what it'd be like to live in some of these fast-growing areas.

Again, a jewel of wisdom flowed from the lips of my beloved as she said:

"I don't know if I'd want to live near here because I'd feel like I was a mouse trapped in a hampster's cage."

The car almost left the road and no, it wasn't because of any ice patches. It was because I was laughing immediately at my wife's attempt to describe a closed in feeling by using some form of common slang. As of this day, I still don't know what phrase she was going for.

"A mouse in a hampster's cage?" I asked her giddily. "How's that any different than being trapped like a hampster in a hampster's cage?"

"Stop it, Jimmy!!" she said in a scolding yet amused fashion. She then proceeded to stick her tongue out at me and give me a rasberry.

Her words of wisdom do more to give me fits of laughter than words to live by but that's OK. She's still the love of my life and that's just one of those special things about her that make her unique.

That and the fact that she was smart enough to let ME think I was smart enough to work in radio yet marry a doctor. I think she's got me more figured out than I'm led to believe.

Tomorrow, more words of wisdom...